Excuse the TVD-ish reference there cause its probably my favourite drama/thing or whatsoever at this moment. Second to Arsenal ofcourse.

Just watched the promo for TVD 3x14. And what the actual fuck. Damon and Stefan fight? And one of them throws the other off the second floor of Klaus' mansion. Seriously..Elena isn't that great. If you ask me, in a way she doesn't deserve either of them..but ofcourse I am always biased towards Damon. Yes, both have done many questionable things. But they never stopped caring about her and loving her. And finally after some 150 years which drove a wedge between them because either of them could get over the pain of the previous love triangle, they finally bonded as brothers. Finally..they stopped being on opposite ends and started communicating more..like real brothers. And now, Elena? Seriously. And cause she just can't make up her mind on Damon or Stefan its just making the wedge between them worse..probably because neither of them can stand the idea of Elena being with another person..

And then there is Damon..Oh my Damon. He was genuine, sweet and nice..and so gentlemanly when he was human. But his love for Katherine wasn't enough (I still find Katherine cool regardless of how much of a bitch she has been. LOL). And he turned. And he changed cause the one girl whom he loved was 'killed'..or at least he thought she was. And in some ways, Stefan was to blame. And he took out all his hate and anger on everything else, in particular Stefan cause he was the reason for it all. And he changed. Became malicious..a slightly less conniving version of Katherine herself. Only to realise that the woman he loved so much never quite loved him back to hold on or to come back to even say something even though she was alive all along..all the times he was desperately trying to find for ways to bring her back from the tomb. Ouch. And then..enter: Elena. Looks aside, she is completely different. But she made him feel again. Managed to break through that wall of 'oh whatever I don't give a shit anymore' and made him feel happy for once. But all for nothing cause she wasn't hers..she was with his brother..the same brother whom Katherine loved more than him.

And FINALLY when he is actually softening up to Elena in her post-Stefan period where she went through crap and she actually started developing substantial feelings for him, putting aside the subtle feelings she had in Season 2..they make him go crazy and do crazy stuff(Judging from the 3x14 promo.)

Seriously, just give him a break and not keep causing him pain of all sorts. 'There is only so much hurt a man can take.' He said it himself. Just..let him be happy please. He deserves that much after all this time. He changed for the better..for Elena..and he is finally letting some of his humanity show again. Don't crush him and make him feel like crap and make him go back to being the vampiric, emotionless, ruthless Damon he was :(

I know, I rant a lot when it comes to my favourite shows.

And retreating into the real world..I think I am having a headache. Tired of having this prolonged feelings of insecurity where I can never live up to the expectations of myself..of others. It sucks. But I don't wanna feel anymore.

Perhaps..I should just get some sleep.

Fuck.

Arsenal is up later. Please win and give me smthg to smile about. It really has been a miserable week.

Victoria Concordia Crescit,